For politicians everywhere, a quiet word in your ear from Mr Krushchev

“Politicians are the same all over. They promise to build a bridge even where there is no river.”

The words of wily old Soviet dictator Nikita Krushchev, who once took the world to within an inch of nuclear war, knew what he was talking about.

Down here in a distant world,  a wasteland, beautiful and richly endowed with natural wonders, promises and more promises spew out every day. Jobs and prosperity for all. There shall be no election violence as polling approaches. Voting will be free and fair. Freedom of expression, of movement and association for campaigning – and remedies in the courts for rigging – are guaranteed.

Schools and hospitals are on the mend. The days of money launderers with dirty hands are numbered. The game is up for ‘econonomic saboteurs’ whoever they may be. Elections are set down for August 23 and the propaganda machine is running at full blast.

Heard it all before? No-one believes it and the rulers who utter it must be stupid enough to think everyone else is stupid. Or the normal election charade is to be expected.

That extraordinary promise of jobs and prosperity comes amid the worst economic depredations for years, hardened by the greed and selfishness of leaders who don’t care a jot about the people beneath them.

Employment is at record lows, inflation has soared, the local currency has crashed and basic foods in the shops (Pick n Pay supermarket chain, now called “Pick n Cry”) are out of reach.

But key security personell have just received handsome handouts and judges have been given massive bonuses in hard currency from the public purse, not from proceeds of gold smuggling and scams going on to perpetuate the echelons of power.

One father writes on social media it’s unbearable to hear his children crying out for food during the night.

Right you are, Mr Krushchev. Bridges galore but no river.